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I don't want your baby. I want mine. . There are 2 things that happen when you have a miscarriage. . 1. Everybody apologises to you. If you mention it in passing or somebody 'accidentally talks about pregnancy' in front of you, they say sorry immediately and recoil from the conversation. . 2. People assume they can't tell you about their pregnancy because they don't want to upset you. . The latter is the most difficult to deal with. Some of my best friends have had to say "I'm sorry to upset you but I'm pregnant" or tell my Husband so that he can "break it to me gently". . I have had 4 miscarriages and I will feel those losses for the rest of my life. Those losses have changed me as a person, reshaped my values and taught me how to cope with grief. Not one of those miscarriages has taken away my ability to be overwhelmingly, outrageously, over the moon for you and your pregnancy. . If I cry, I am not crying for your pregnancy, I am simply remembering mine. I WANT you to tell me - I want to shed a tear and hug you and tell you how excited I am. I mean it - every single bit of that excitement. But when you DON'T tell me... I feel like I have something to be ashamed of. I feel like in losing my babies I have also lost a sense of the friendship I once had with you and that brings me to tears for a different reason. . I've lost babies but I don't want yours, I'll happily wait for mine. . #babyloss #babylossawareness #miscarriage #motherhood #lifeafterloss #children #pregnancy #earlypregnancy #pregnancyannouncement #baby #grief #friendship